The Wall

i don't know how to respond, no react, to a 12 foot wall that keeps people out of this country. when i listen to the news reports, border crossings between mexico and the united states are a hot topic. i've heard phrases like 'shoot them', 'send them all back', and other sundry sayings from the lips of american citizens (who identify themselves as christians). it's distressing to have any feelings because then people become human somehow.
am i human?
does someone want to shoot me because of the color of my skin?
does someone want to send me back to where i came from? kind of late, slavery got me here and my roots have been mixed within a big tree called united states of america.
'them'
'illegal aliens'
'immigrants'
how about human created in the image of God?
i've seen the wall, 12 feet and seemingly endless. and i can walk away from it, get in a car and drive away to a dinner appointment.

on filming

okay,
i like being behind the camera. i get to set the shot and watch others look at what is going on. i am learning with each filming experience.
laura's got a great ear for sound and angela's skill at getting people in front of the camera can't be questioned. i'm thinking about how to film that experience.
laura and i had our backs to the crowd walking across the street. i just can't walk up to someone and ask them a question. so, not paying attention works. people walked up to laura and myself and asked, 'are you making a documentary?' WONDERFUL! but they talked and didn't want to be filmed. one angry young woman said, 'God ain't here!'
there were many well wishers, 'good luck' and all that.
but, i've got to tell you that we have trusted in prayer being the work and then we proceed.
it makes my heart feel better.
i met a screen play (2 words?) writer at the belagio hotel - in front of the large pond/mine-lake. anyway, justin asked us many questions. and i didn't have any answers. it was refreshing to receive knowledgable information on better filming and thinking about shots.

From New Mexico thru Arizona to Las Vegas

well, well, well;
so, i started this journey with an idea to document the answer to a question; 'where can i find God in the place where you live?'
it became a big monster type of thing. and then after seeking sane counsel, it became about me resting after graduating from seminary. that lasted about 6 hours.
this trip has become more about meeting the people and documenting their answers to that question. it's no longer about the scenery. there is beautiful country in the southwest of this country. but...
i'm standing in the motel/hotel room in gallup nm and feeling pain in my heart. i ask angela and laura if they can feel the pain of the place. i have started to feel with a different heart and to see with different eyes - and it hurts. i had to ask God where was he. it was just overwhelming. people are surviving, not living. there's not enough water to water crops, homeless people are invisible (who wants to see hungry dirty people anyway), and depending on the tribe, i am made to feel like an outside nuisance.
i hate my own personal prejudices and despise it in others.
in some places it's all about the money - damn the soul.
flesh screams across big screens on the las vegas boulevard and children walk under the lights of it all. alcohol propels people across the streets and into casinos (i'm surprised i've not seen a slot machine next to a toilet).
but we want our freedom
we want our rights
freedom from what and the right to do what?
it's monday.
i found God at the arizona border in the midst of a group of young people (riding across america in a bus). and sunday morning i sang songs in a church (baptist)
God's working out my own prejudices about white people, and baptists, and homeless people, and church in general. there is so much pain in the faces of people. this trip is not about finding a right answer, it's about giving people a voice. a voice that may have been taken from them.
no cliche answers allowed. where is God anyway when life isn't working? it's different for each person.